Father

Everyday a new day,

The fearlessness has become

alive deep inside,

It’s returned once again.

Something about me,

Makes him awaken,

From his deep sleep.

He once said ‘You are the most like her’

Me being me...

‘Why? Am I telling you off and you think I am annoying?’

Him: ‘No. She was a lady and I never thought she was annoying’

Any compliment he ever gave me,

Well before he was sick,

Before the trauma of Mum’s death,

I batted each and every compliment away,

A seasoned pro.

Now I think back with regret and remorse,

Why did I have to be that way?

I would do anything to go back in time and say ‘Thank you! I love you!’

Once upon a time,

He said ‘Mary-Kate is the cross one! Everyone says so!’

I was perplexed,

I’ve never seen myself this way.

Maybe I was,

Is it because when I do not smile I look scary?

I can’t remember being cross on purpose,

I am quick tempered,

I will admit to that,

I am who I am,

It’s too late to change now.

I like to right wrongs,

Speak up when everyone acts dumb,

I won’t agree for the sake of things,

I fight on,

That’s no surprise.

Granny Nevin always said I was his twin,

He didn’t like that much,

For he felt that he was an original.

I knew I was his mini me,

A tiny chip off the same block,

Made me laugh,

Made him weep,

I didn’t care...

I knew I was part of him.

I was a smaller version of himself,

Even if that made him weep it made me laugh,

I used to be a machine,

Just like him,

A winner.

I didn’t like tears,

Weeping was for dead beats,

Yet sometimes I was like Mum too,

I was kind,

I tried to channel peace and love,

That didn’t always work.

Yet we all knew,

Dad and I were the same,

We look and act the same way.

We can be fun,

Sometimes erratic and tiresome,

Just because of the loudness,

We love to talk,

Never malicious,

That ain’t us.

Bad tempered but we forget these arguments easily,

We see the sunny side to life,

We love laughter and love,

Life brings us fun,

Always looking on the happy side of living,

Our glasses are always half full.

Yet last night you said...

‘I love you Mary. I know you know that. You will always know that!’

He was shattered after that,

Made my whole life though,

I laughed and then I giggled some more,

Happiness filled every inch of me.

My husband asked him easy questions,

Dad seemed delighted he had escaped me,

Life was back to normal,

Nevin v’s Crooks.

We understood him freely,

He replied...

‘I’m not in pain for once, I feel more like myself.’

Then I heard the quietness,

An eternity,

Fear filled me,

Then...

The blissful sound of his snoring!

My Superman had found some peace,

Sleep eases his anguish,

Makes him forget,

Back to the beginning.

I hung up and cried,

Distance is always in our way,

Though we both know,

Our love shall always be alive and well.

The best-friend and gentleman,

I could have ever dreamed of,

My lovely father,

Always there,

Standing strong,

Leading us down the right path,

Wishing a better life for us all,

He owns our hearts.